FOXDALE remains the centre of the conker playing world following the World Conker Championships.
Father and son team Stephen and Luke Howarth, from Foxdale, took the senior and junior titles at Braaid Hall on Saturday night. Read more
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Sunday, April 20, 2008
What are the effects of an affair on children?
What are the effects of an affair on children? Summary :
-----
What are the effects of an affair on children? by Jeffrey D
"What are the effects of an affair on children?"
by Jeffrey D. Murrah, LPC, LMFT
"What are the effects of an affair on children?"
is a question that people often search for.
Although the question looks for a simple answer,
since affairs are not cut and dried situations,
the answers are not cut and dried either. Since,
the quality of the question determines the
quality of the answer, there are some things to
consider.
-What are the ages of the children? The age and
maturity level will have some influence on how
they react to an affair situation.
-Which children are you concerned with, those of
the third party or of the adulterous spouse's
family? Depending on the family value system and
which family the children are a part of, their
response to the affair will differ.
-How the spouses react to the affair is
influenced by how the children respond. Since
children often look to their parents for cues as
to how they should respond, if you 'freak out',
they will have problems adjusting. You can't
loose it and expect your children to keep it
together. If you take things in stride, the
children will likely adjust to changes in a calm
manner as well. The big exception to this is if
the affair behavior is radically contrary to the
values of the home.
-Children often react more to the issues and
problems surrounding the affair. The lying,
secrets, arguing and fighting are often more
difficult for them to adjust to than the affair
itself. When the parents fight, the security of
their world is threatened. They need to have
trustworthy and believable parents. When the
parents do not display those qualities, problems
result.
-The very act of an affair is an act of
selfishness and little self-control. It sends a
message of rejection to the children. Had the
adulterer thought about the children and its
potential effects, the affair would not likely
have occurred. The children recognize this. They
may express an acceptance of the situation, yet
they often carry the scars of the rejection. They
know that the adulterer was thinking about
themselves ahead of them. They look at what the
parents do, not so much what they say. The
actions speak loudly concerning the self focus of
those involved. An affair does not mean that
those involved are bad parents, it does mean that
there are some problems with selfishness and weak
self-control that need attention.
-It is also important to consider what is the
motivation behind the asking the question
concerning "What are the effects of an affair on
children?". The motive often says a great deal as
well, whether from a spouse attempting to justify
their actions, to those who are attempting to
remove the adulterous spouse from access to the
children. Children need both of their parents.
They need to see healing. They need to see
parents working things out and resolving their
differences.
-If the affair develops into a pregnancy, the
intensity of feelings are greater. In such cases,
the new child may become an emotional lightning
rod for both positive and negative feelings that
exists within the family. Although the affair may
fade away, the child will not.
These are just some of the many things to
consider when looking at the effects of an affair
on children. More specific questions like, "How
will the affair effect the trust in the
relationship between us?", "What can I do to help
my child get through the affair?". "How long will
it take before things are normal with the
children after the affair?" can provide more
meaningful answers that hurting parents are
seeking. Some things remain clear even in the
confusion surrounding an affair. Children need
their parents. They need to be able to trust and
believe what their parents tell them. They need
you to be there as they begin dealing with such
situations.
www.Restorethefamily.com
www.SurviveYourPartnersAffair.com
http://www.pasadenaisd.org/ParentUniversity/
pudefault.htm
Article Source: ArticleRich.com
-----
Statistically Improbable Phrases In What are the effects of an affair on children?:
affair, infidelity, marriage, parenting, adultery
World
A brief overview looking at how affairs effect children.
-----
What are the effects of an affair on children? by Jeffrey D
"What are the effects of an affair on children?"
by Jeffrey D. Murrah, LPC, LMFT
"What are the effects of an affair on children?"
is a question that people often search for.
Although the question looks for a simple answer,
since affairs are not cut and dried situations,
the answers are not cut and dried either. Since,
the quality of the question determines the
quality of the answer, there are some things to
consider.
-What are the ages of the children? The age and
maturity level will have some influence on how
they react to an affair situation.
-Which children are you concerned with, those of
the third party or of the adulterous spouse's
family? Depending on the family value system and
which family the children are a part of, their
response to the affair will differ.
-How the spouses react to the affair is
influenced by how the children respond. Since
children often look to their parents for cues as
to how they should respond, if you 'freak out',
they will have problems adjusting. You can't
loose it and expect your children to keep it
together. If you take things in stride, the
children will likely adjust to changes in a calm
manner as well. The big exception to this is if
the affair behavior is radically contrary to the
values of the home.
-Children often react more to the issues and
problems surrounding the affair. The lying,
secrets, arguing and fighting are often more
difficult for them to adjust to than the affair
itself. When the parents fight, the security of
their world is threatened. They need to have
trustworthy and believable parents. When the
parents do not display those qualities, problems
result.
-The very act of an affair is an act of
selfishness and little self-control. It sends a
message of rejection to the children. Had the
adulterer thought about the children and its
potential effects, the affair would not likely
have occurred. The children recognize this. They
may express an acceptance of the situation, yet
they often carry the scars of the rejection. They
know that the adulterer was thinking about
themselves ahead of them. They look at what the
parents do, not so much what they say. The
actions speak loudly concerning the self focus of
those involved. An affair does not mean that
those involved are bad parents, it does mean that
there are some problems with selfishness and weak
self-control that need attention.
-It is also important to consider what is the
motivation behind the asking the question
concerning "What are the effects of an affair on
children?". The motive often says a great deal as
well, whether from a spouse attempting to justify
their actions, to those who are attempting to
remove the adulterous spouse from access to the
children. Children need both of their parents.
They need to see healing. They need to see
parents working things out and resolving their
differences.
-If the affair develops into a pregnancy, the
intensity of feelings are greater. In such cases,
the new child may become an emotional lightning
rod for both positive and negative feelings that
exists within the family. Although the affair may
fade away, the child will not.
These are just some of the many things to
consider when looking at the effects of an affair
on children. More specific questions like, "How
will the affair effect the trust in the
relationship between us?", "What can I do to help
my child get through the affair?". "How long will
it take before things are normal with the
children after the affair?" can provide more
meaningful answers that hurting parents are
seeking. Some things remain clear even in the
confusion surrounding an affair. Children need
their parents. They need to be able to trust and
believe what their parents tell them. They need
you to be there as they begin dealing with such
situations.
www.Restorethefamily.com
www.SurviveYourPartnersAffair.com
http://www.pasadenaisd.org/ParentUniversity/
pudefault.htm
Article Source: ArticleRich.com
-----
Statistically Improbable Phrases In What are the effects of an affair on children?:
affair, infidelity, marriage, parenting, adultery
World
Saturday, June 2, 2007
(WorldAO) Victorinox Lifestyle Accessories Collection Boarding Pouch
(WorldAO) Victorinox Lifestyle Accessories Collection Boarding Pouch - Long strap can be worn around neck or cross body. Two large pockets store most sizes of currency, tickets, passports, travelers checks, etc. Zippered pocket perfect for coins and other loose items.
Micro-screen mesh slot keeps your ID easily visible and accessible7.50"h x 4.75"w x 0.38"d = 12.69 cu." (12.625 Linear inches) Expanded: 7.50"h x 4.75"w x 0.38"d = 12.69 cu." (12.625 Linear inches).
World
Thursday, May 31, 2007
(WAffair) 10-Heart Cards Love Affair
(WAffair) 10-Heart Cards Love Affair - Beautiful mixed media heart cards by the artist Paul Nash 10 in the pack Title "Love Affair"
World
Monday, May 28, 2007
World - Celebrity In-Style Square Sunglasses - New !
World - Celebrity In-Style Square Sunglasses - New ! - Designer style sunglasses are stylish and of good quality.Its a great way to stay current with today's trend without spending a fortune.
World
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Should We Worry About Immigrant Assimilation and Education?
World Affair Online
Yes, they are important to our future!
Many of tomorrow's workers and business owners are the children of today's immigrants. More than 40% of the growth of our labor force in the late 1990s was due to immigrants, and since immigration WILL continue, they are important to our future growth.
A concern is certainly that many of today's Hispanic/Latino immigrants are uneducated and unskilled: this could mean that their children will not fit into our knowledge-based and high-tech economy. Often when parents are uneducated, they have lower expectations and don't encourage their children to stay in high school and go on to college. These parents very often need their children to work in the shops they own or contribute to the household income with outside jobs. Many of their children must drop out of high school to help the family survive financially.
Twenty five percent of the children under the age of six in the U.S. are children of immigrants, the majority in poor families. If these children went to preschool, it would dramatically change their lives, especially if there were also some services available for their parents. If these parents could go to nearby ESL classes and learn some tips on early child rearing, and be shown how important it is for their children to get an education, it would help tremendously in the children's later public school years.
Children who get preschool education are much more likely to do well in school and less likely to drop out or get into trouble. This is true for immigrant children and any other children who are living in poverty.
It would be wonderful if all parents could get some of this training, but poor parents need it most, especially if they don’t speak English at home or if they don’t have much education themselves.
Blue-collar jobs are on the decline in many parts of the U.S. Factories and textile mills are closing and moving to other countries, shocking many people who were born here and have worked in these factories for decades. Money is often spent to re-educate these workers, yet many of them are unable to learn the computers well enough for these high tech jobs because of their age or their own education shortcomings.
Immigrants’ children who have dropped out of school and have no training in these high-tech positions will have the same problem. Immigrants with limited skills will always work at whatever job they can find; this probably means they will always work at low paying jobs and never get out of poverty. If they are forced to raise their own children in poverty, the cycle continues.
Once they are fluent in English and learn U.S. laws, they have a much greater chance of getting better jobs, although the wage gap between them and people born here may still be quite wide.
Undocumented Hispanic teens who are in our public schools may have lower educational aspirations and not try to finish high school, even when their parents do not need their income. They often feel discouraged because they don't think they can get a college education, or if they do get one, that they won't be eligible to work here.
Some states are allowing undocumented students who have attended and graduated from their high schools to attend public state colleges at in-state rates. If these teens have lived in that state for years, have received a good education in those schools and have graduated, why shouldn’t they be allowed to continue their education there without paying the higher non-resident rates?
If they gradute from college, they should be able to apply for citizenship and use their degree to get a high paying job in this country. These workers will contribute to their community, start businesses, buy houses and be wonderful Americans. The money that was spent by the state to educate them to grade 12 will be repaid many times over.
We need skilled and highly trained workers, why would we want these kids to stop their schooling and be forced to work in low paying jobs the rest of their lives? That does not help any of us.
About the author:
Donna Poisl is President of Live & Thrive Press and the author of "How to Live & Thrive in the U.S. / Como Vivir y Prosperar en Estados Unidos". She wrote this reference guide to help immigrants learn our system and succeed in this country. Contact Donna at http://www.howtoliveandthrive.com
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Yes, they are important to our future!
Many of tomorrow's workers and business owners are the children of today's immigrants. More than 40% of the growth of our labor force in the late 1990s was due to immigrants, and since immigration WILL continue, they are important to our future growth.
A concern is certainly that many of today's Hispanic/Latino immigrants are uneducated and unskilled: this could mean that their children will not fit into our knowledge-based and high-tech economy. Often when parents are uneducated, they have lower expectations and don't encourage their children to stay in high school and go on to college. These parents very often need their children to work in the shops they own or contribute to the household income with outside jobs. Many of their children must drop out of high school to help the family survive financially.
Twenty five percent of the children under the age of six in the U.S. are children of immigrants, the majority in poor families. If these children went to preschool, it would dramatically change their lives, especially if there were also some services available for their parents. If these parents could go to nearby ESL classes and learn some tips on early child rearing, and be shown how important it is for their children to get an education, it would help tremendously in the children's later public school years.
Children who get preschool education are much more likely to do well in school and less likely to drop out or get into trouble. This is true for immigrant children and any other children who are living in poverty.
It would be wonderful if all parents could get some of this training, but poor parents need it most, especially if they don’t speak English at home or if they don’t have much education themselves.
Blue-collar jobs are on the decline in many parts of the U.S. Factories and textile mills are closing and moving to other countries, shocking many people who were born here and have worked in these factories for decades. Money is often spent to re-educate these workers, yet many of them are unable to learn the computers well enough for these high tech jobs because of their age or their own education shortcomings.
Immigrants’ children who have dropped out of school and have no training in these high-tech positions will have the same problem. Immigrants with limited skills will always work at whatever job they can find; this probably means they will always work at low paying jobs and never get out of poverty. If they are forced to raise their own children in poverty, the cycle continues.
Once they are fluent in English and learn U.S. laws, they have a much greater chance of getting better jobs, although the wage gap between them and people born here may still be quite wide.
Undocumented Hispanic teens who are in our public schools may have lower educational aspirations and not try to finish high school, even when their parents do not need their income. They often feel discouraged because they don't think they can get a college education, or if they do get one, that they won't be eligible to work here.
Some states are allowing undocumented students who have attended and graduated from their high schools to attend public state colleges at in-state rates. If these teens have lived in that state for years, have received a good education in those schools and have graduated, why shouldn’t they be allowed to continue their education there without paying the higher non-resident rates?
If they gradute from college, they should be able to apply for citizenship and use their degree to get a high paying job in this country. These workers will contribute to their community, start businesses, buy houses and be wonderful Americans. The money that was spent by the state to educate them to grade 12 will be repaid many times over.
We need skilled and highly trained workers, why would we want these kids to stop their schooling and be forced to work in low paying jobs the rest of their lives? That does not help any of us.
About the author:
Donna Poisl is President of Live & Thrive Press and the author of "How to Live & Thrive in the U.S. / Como Vivir y Prosperar en Estados Unidos". She wrote this reference guide to help immigrants learn our system and succeed in this country. Contact Donna at http://www.howtoliveandthrive.com
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Sunday, February 4, 2007
There ARE Atheists in Foxholes! Veterans Day Event in Nation's Capital to Honor Military Atheists
Nov. 9, 2005
The expression "There are no atheists in foxholes" is widely used by religious leaders, politicians and the media.
It is a false and bigoted statement.
"There are atheists in foxholes," says atheist Jason Torpy of Ohio, a retired U.S. Army captain.
Torpy joined the Army in 1994 right after graduating high school. He now serves as president of the Military Association of Atheists and Freethinkers, an Internet-based support network for non-theistic service members.
On Nov. 10-11, Torpy will join other atheist veterans and active duty service members to participate in a Washington D.C. event honoring those who have served in the United States Armed Forces and who do not believe in God or gods. On Friday, Nov. 11, there will be a Veterans Day "Atheists in Foxholes" parade and rally on the national mall, starting at 11 a.m.
World War II journalist Ernie Pyle is often credited for coining the expression "There are no atheists in foxholes." The canard-turned-cliche implies that an atheist will quickly turn to a god or gods for assistance in times of duress. Some atheist veterans refute that implication with first-hand experience.
"As a member of the Army for more than 20 years, I have faced danger -- along with thousands of other atheists who have served -- and have never felt compelled to call upon any invisible deities in the sky for protection," said U.S. Army Master Sgt. Kathleen Johnson, an atheist on active duty at Fort Hood, Texas.
Retired U.S. Army 1st Sgt. Warren Allen Smith, an octogenarian, also refutes the claim that danger turns atheists into "believers". After being drafted into the Army during World War II, Smith led his company onto Omaha Beach in 1944.
"I was one of those 'atheists in a foxhole'," Smith said. "With Bertrand Russell, I am well aware that when we die we become food for the worms. And, well, after Omaha Beach who's afraid of worms?"
The author of Who's Who in Hell and Celebrities in Hell, Smith now lives in New York City. He will join a roster of distinguished veterans and freethought leaders to speak during the "Atheist in Foxholes" Veterans Day rally.
Another veteran slated to speak, is Hans Kasten, an American prisoner of war who was forced into slave labor by the Nazis during World War II.
In spite of what images the event's title might evoke, Master Sgt. Johnson said the "Atheists in Foxholes" march is not about war.
"It's about debunking the pernicious myth that patriotic and courageous military service requires religious faith," she said.
The rally is also intended to give freethinkers the chance to show support for the members of their community who have served or are serving in the armed forces. Master Sgt. Johnson said it is important for the community to know that atheists in the military face harassment and discrimination because of their lack of religious beliefs.
"The military is very much about 'god and country'," she said. "And religious rituals are incorporated into pretty much every significant military event and ceremony."
That's partially why Master Sgt. Johnson founded the Military Association of Atheists and Freethinkers in 1997. She is also the military director of American Atheists, the national organization sponsoring the Veterans Day events to honor military atheists.
One of the endorsing organizations of the "Atheists in Foxholes" event is the Institute for Humanist Studies (IHS), an Albany N.Y.-based think tank that promotes the non-religious philosophy of humanism. IHS President Larry Jones will speak at the welcome banquet on Nov. 10, and IHS Executive Director Matt Cherry will speak at the Nov. 11 rally.
Cherry said that the expression "There are no atheists in foxholes" is one of several myths about atheists perpetuated by the media.
"When someone says there are no atheists in foxholes, or in hurricanes, they are saying there are no true atheists," Cherry said. "When the media describe me as a 'self-declared atheist' -- but don't call the Pope a 'self-declared Christian' -- they are saying that I am deluded and he is for real. They are saying 'atheism' isn't for real."
Retired U.S. Army Captain Torpy also noted that the saying is not only insulting to atheists but to those who follow a religion, as well, because "it implies that fear, rather than belief or love, is a legitimate basis for faith."
About the author:
For information about the Nov. 11 "Atheists in Foxholes" march and rally in Washington D.C., visit: http://www.atheistfoxholes.org;see also: www.atheists.org.For information about the Military Association of Atheists and Freethinkers, visit: http://www.maaf.info.
Duncan Crary is the director of communications at the Institute for Humanist Studies, http://www.HumanistStudies.org.He is the editor of the Institute's weekly e-zine, http://www.HumanistNetworkNews.org
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The expression "There are no atheists in foxholes" is widely used by religious leaders, politicians and the media.
It is a false and bigoted statement.
"There are atheists in foxholes," says atheist Jason Torpy of Ohio, a retired U.S. Army captain.
Torpy joined the Army in 1994 right after graduating high school. He now serves as president of the Military Association of Atheists and Freethinkers, an Internet-based support network for non-theistic service members.
On Nov. 10-11, Torpy will join other atheist veterans and active duty service members to participate in a Washington D.C. event honoring those who have served in the United States Armed Forces and who do not believe in God or gods. On Friday, Nov. 11, there will be a Veterans Day "Atheists in Foxholes" parade and rally on the national mall, starting at 11 a.m.
World War II journalist Ernie Pyle is often credited for coining the expression "There are no atheists in foxholes." The canard-turned-cliche implies that an atheist will quickly turn to a god or gods for assistance in times of duress. Some atheist veterans refute that implication with first-hand experience.
"As a member of the Army for more than 20 years, I have faced danger -- along with thousands of other atheists who have served -- and have never felt compelled to call upon any invisible deities in the sky for protection," said U.S. Army Master Sgt. Kathleen Johnson, an atheist on active duty at Fort Hood, Texas.
Retired U.S. Army 1st Sgt. Warren Allen Smith, an octogenarian, also refutes the claim that danger turns atheists into "believers". After being drafted into the Army during World War II, Smith led his company onto Omaha Beach in 1944.
"I was one of those 'atheists in a foxhole'," Smith said. "With Bertrand Russell, I am well aware that when we die we become food for the worms. And, well, after Omaha Beach who's afraid of worms?"
The author of Who's Who in Hell and Celebrities in Hell, Smith now lives in New York City. He will join a roster of distinguished veterans and freethought leaders to speak during the "Atheist in Foxholes" Veterans Day rally.
Another veteran slated to speak, is Hans Kasten, an American prisoner of war who was forced into slave labor by the Nazis during World War II.
In spite of what images the event's title might evoke, Master Sgt. Johnson said the "Atheists in Foxholes" march is not about war.
"It's about debunking the pernicious myth that patriotic and courageous military service requires religious faith," she said.
The rally is also intended to give freethinkers the chance to show support for the members of their community who have served or are serving in the armed forces. Master Sgt. Johnson said it is important for the community to know that atheists in the military face harassment and discrimination because of their lack of religious beliefs.
"The military is very much about 'god and country'," she said. "And religious rituals are incorporated into pretty much every significant military event and ceremony."
That's partially why Master Sgt. Johnson founded the Military Association of Atheists and Freethinkers in 1997. She is also the military director of American Atheists, the national organization sponsoring the Veterans Day events to honor military atheists.
One of the endorsing organizations of the "Atheists in Foxholes" event is the Institute for Humanist Studies (IHS), an Albany N.Y.-based think tank that promotes the non-religious philosophy of humanism. IHS President Larry Jones will speak at the welcome banquet on Nov. 10, and IHS Executive Director Matt Cherry will speak at the Nov. 11 rally.
Cherry said that the expression "There are no atheists in foxholes" is one of several myths about atheists perpetuated by the media.
"When someone says there are no atheists in foxholes, or in hurricanes, they are saying there are no true atheists," Cherry said. "When the media describe me as a 'self-declared atheist' -- but don't call the Pope a 'self-declared Christian' -- they are saying that I am deluded and he is for real. They are saying 'atheism' isn't for real."
Retired U.S. Army Captain Torpy also noted that the saying is not only insulting to atheists but to those who follow a religion, as well, because "it implies that fear, rather than belief or love, is a legitimate basis for faith."
About the author:
For information about the Nov. 11 "Atheists in Foxholes" march and rally in Washington D.C., visit: http://www.atheistfoxholes.org;see also: www.atheists.org.For information about the Military Association of Atheists and Freethinkers, visit: http://www.maaf.info.
Duncan Crary is the director of communications at the Institute for Humanist Studies, http://www.HumanistStudies.org.He is the editor of the Institute's weekly e-zine, http://www.HumanistNetworkNews.org
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